Have you ever been sitting poolside, sipping on a cocktail in a tropical destination, only to be abruptly interrupted by nagging worry that you weren’t in this week’s team check-in?
“Vacation guilt” is a common occurrence among American workers, many of whom say they can’t help but feel guilty when they’re on vacation. A 2024 survey of more than 2,000 employed adults conducted by the communications firm Movchan Agency found nearly half of workers feel guilty while on vacation, while 63% feel anxious if they don’t check their work-related messages during a trip.
But there’s a growing movement to embrace PTO and throw vacation guilt to the curb: The “loud vacationing” trend, increased awareness about burnout, and Gen Zers fearlessly embracing mental health days.
And there’s hope for those who are using paid time off to unwind, but struggle to unplug, according to Dennis Dearie, a licensed therapist at Healthy Life Recovery in San Diego.
“If a person has problems with taking vacations, that’s just one symptom of a bigger challenge they have,” Dearie told Business Insider, adding that there are plenty of reasons a worker might feel guilty about taking vacation.
Employees might have valid concerns about job security: They might feel that if someone else picks up their responsibilities while they’re out, they’ll be seen as dispensable or not good at their job. Others might struggle with giving up control over their work, if someone else has to step in when they’re out.
Dearie said some employees genuinely feel guilty that their time out of the office will burden their coworkers who pick up their slack. They might also work somewhere with a company culture that discourages time off, leading to feelings of guilt among those who do take vacation anyway.
It’s important to figure out what the cause of the vacation guilt is because that will help determine how to address it.
Be mindful and take a look at your values
For people who grind at work, being mindful about why they are struggling to unplug could be the first challenge. “They have to stop working and think about stuff that they probably don’t think about,” Dearie said.
He said many people who focus a lot on work tend to derive a lot of value from it. Work gives them a sense of purpose and a sense of accomplishment, but focusing on work can mean other values suffer, like spending quality time with your kids or partner.
It can help to take an honest look at your values and compare them to how you spend your time, Dearie said, adding you should ask yourself, “Why is unplugging valuable to me?”
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Plan and delegate
If you are struggling not to feel guilty on vacation because of all the work that’s on your plate, Dearie said it’s important to plan ahead and inform your team as early as possible when you will be out.
Delegate everything that needs to be done while you are gone and leave thoughtful instructions. Let clients know who they can contact at the company while you’re on PTO, so you are not anxious about whether they are expecting a response from you.
Support your coworkers when they take PTO
If taking a guilt-free vacation is challenging for you, be supportive and enthusiastic when your team members take time off, Dearie said.
Offer to take work off their plates when they are on vacation, or ask how you can help them feel confident taking time off.
Helping your colleagues take time off can foster a feeling on your team that everyone is chipping in and doing their share to encourage PTO, and it can also get you an ally when you want to take time off.
“You’re helping the culture in your company adjust,” he said, adding that you can shift company culture, at least on your team, and help set the precedence that taking time off is OK.
Practice with micro-unplugging
Regardless of why you’re struggling to take time off, Dearie said “micro-unplugging” — or tuning out from work for short periods of time — can help you get better at it for longer stretches of PTO, too.
“Everything we do is training our brain,” Dearie said, adding that our brains can learn to tolerate new things, like tuning out from work, with practice.
If you especially struggle to unplug, Dearie said you could start by taking a single day off in the middle of the week. Plan ahead and let your coworkers know what to do in your absence or how reachable you are. Maybe refrain from checking your work messages all day, or checking them only twice that day, or even once per hour, depending on how difficult unplugging for you is.
The goal is simply to unplug for longer than you normally do, Dearie said. You can build up that tolerance over time.
“It’s like a vacation, but not a vacation, and it’s uncomfortable. It’s going to produce anxiety,” Dearie said.
Micro-unplugging can help bridge the gap between what a person believes — that taking time away from work is good for them — and how their brain actually responds.
“They believe it’s true, but it doesn’t feel true,” Dearie said of taking time off. “When they do these behaviors, their brain can catch up with that truth.”
