This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Lauren Brusie, mom of seven. It has been edited for length and clarity.
Last year, my 87-year-old grandmother, Doris, and 90-year-old grandfather, Jerry, hosted nine of their 14 great-grandchildren for a Christmas sleepover at their house. It’s an annual tradition they started several years ago that involves a night of eating cookies and ice cream, kids playing, boys wrestling, and movie watching, all culminating in Doris and Jerry waking up bright and early the very next day to cook breakfast for everyone, smiling and chipper as ever.
As their 34-year-old granddaughter, I’m not sure how they have the energy they do.
They are the most joyful, generous, busy, and amazing people I know, and they have been a constant presence in my life. They were always there. For all six of us grandchildren, for every game, every school event, they were there. We spent our weekends with them, holidays with them, and summers at their cabin.
They’ve definitely helped shape my cousins and me, and they continue to maintain that loving presence and involvement with all their great-grandchildren, including my seven children.
My grandparents have been there for my kids since day one
Just like I can’t remember a day in my own life without my grandparents in it, neither do my kids. They were waiting outside the door for their first great-grandchild, my daughter, to be born, and they’ve been there for everything, just like they were for me.
We even lived next door to them for a few years, and we spent every day with them. They are two of the people my kids are most comfortable with, and because of that, they are often our first choice for babysitters on a quick errand. The kids just love to be with them.
We have since moved, but they still stop by at least once a week, call the kids, attend their sporting events, and even help me with running them to and from practice or school.
One of their most beloved traditions is taking out each great-grandchild for a birthday lunch/shopping trip to spend one-on-one time with them. They had a rule that the child needed to be 4 years old, but they have bent it twice now for two of my younger children, taking them on their third birthdays because they were just so excited about it.
Both of my grandparents are in great health, and while some of their longevity and energy is probably genetic, I think their overall joy and love of people has kept them going. They always have something going on with others, whether it’s hanging out with their camping club, golf leagues, bowling leagues, card nights, casino trips, or following us kids around. They’ve always just worked hard and enjoyed life.
They are the biggest blessing in our lives
I’m not sure how to put into words what our relationship with my grandparents means. I’m aware of how unique this is, and I’ve never taken a moment with them for granted. I don’t think my kids will understand it all until they’re older, so for now, I just try to take as many pictures as I can so they’ll know how truly blessed and loved they were by these amazing people.
As life has gotten busier and the kids have gotten older, we make it a priority to continue our relationship with my grandparents. For instance, we’ll stop in to visit, and we try to do malt nights on the weekends with them, just like I did as a kid.
I also try to make them my first call if I do need help with the kids. It gives them purpose, and it really does help me too!
I don’t know anyone who has great-grandparents so involved in their family’s lives
When I try to think of anyone who, like my kids, has not just their grandparents, but their great-grandparents so actively involved, it’s not even a close comparison. And it’s not just my kids — Doris and Jerry still travel all over the state to attend events and visit my cousins and their kids, too. I know my cousins feel the exact same way I do about our grandparents: they are the most incredible people we know, and we’re so lucky to have them.
I am not sure I even appreciated how amazing they were when I was a kid. It took me having my own kids to realize that the relationship I had with them wasn’t necessarily normal either. They are truly one of a kind.
There is so much that inspires me about my grandparents, like their joy and how they’ve dealt with all the ups and downs of life. And let’s be honest: I’d love to have their energy too, but I’ll never count on that!
My grandparents are also so humble about their involvement. Doris simply says that the reason they spend so much time with all of us is because they love us, so why wouldn’t they want to be with us?
Both of them attribute their energy and longevity to being “lucky” and hope that all their grandchildren and great-grandchildren will remember that they were good to them and loved them. I’d say mission accomplished!
