When they were really little, we used to call vacationing with the kids “babysitting with palm trees.” Now that they’re teens, maybe it’s more like “traveling with jerks.”
I mean, sometimes they’re grateful and engaged. But just as often, it can feel like every decision is getting evaluated by the most ruthless, cool-kid jury of tired, bored, entitled judges.
We travel a ton, and I have come to realize there are tricks for making your vacation teen-worthy, while still having the best time yourself. Some are easy, some are annoying. But when the kids are happy, everyone’s happy, right?
We spend 30 minutes in museums, max
If you do not have museum kids, still go, but limit your time. (If you do have museum kids,your vacations are clearly very different than mine.) This is really the key.
Even in the NYC area where we live full-time, we visit museums regularly, but we don’t stay hours. Yes, you paid all that money for your ticket, but you get to decide how long to spend there. For my kids, 30 to 45 minutes is often more than enough time to see the stars of the show and pick their favorite pieces to talk about over pizza later.
No one gets cranky. No one dreads the visit. As they get older, maybe you can stretch it.
We still do things we can do at home
Yes, we all saw the go-cart place we just passed on the highway. But we are in Barcelona. And why on earth would we waste a precious afternoon in Catalonia doing what we can do 20 minutes from home?
Because somehow, it will be an adventure, different than the place back home in interesting and unexpected ways, and you will all actually have fun. Do it.
We like to explore cities in different ways
Take a city tour of Budapest, but do it riding a three-wheeled Segway. My kids love to look for the weird way to sightsee now, and they actually learn a ton about our locations.
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In Marrakesh, we toured the city from the vantage of Soviet-era motorcycle sidecars. Sometimes there are age restrictions that mean you have to skip, but when it works, it’s hard to beat.
Know what your kids are into and plan around that
Are they a teen club kid? If so, amazing! When you go on a beach vacation, that means you’ll have a lot of options. We’ve loved Grand Velas in Riviera Maya, Mexico, any Club Med (the new one in Miches, DR is incredible), or Beaches in Turks and Caicos. The best possible outcome is that they make friends and have the best week doing their own thing with their peers. If teen clubs aren’t their thing, don’t make it a thing. Nothing is worse than having your mom force friends on you.
Take cool classes
We do a cooking class wherever we go now. In Santa Fe this year, we took a super interesting one, making sauces from the region. We learned a ton about the indigenous history while also developing a POV on the ubiquitous local question: “red, green, or Christmas?” In Bogota, we learned how to make delectable smashed plantains that my kids now request whenever they see them on a menu and compare to their memory of what they tasted like in Colombia. In Fez, we made a full 5-course meal from a private home deep inside the medina.
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My kids both love to cook (we do too) so this is a destination “souvenir” that we cherish and refer back to again and again.
Screen time is flexible
If only they would put the phone down, they could appreciate the incredible, once-in-a-lifetime view. But spending every minute traveling (and maybe sharing a hotel room) with your parents can be tough.
If they are spending more time than you’d like on their device, but still otherwise engaged, I let it slide. Offer to help by being the photographer and shoot them in 4,567,354 poses for their one IG “post” of the trip. There. Now you’ve made it a family activity.
Divide and conquer to do what everyone loves
My son loves golf — I couldn’t care less. So we build in some divide-and-conquer time when we each do what we love. (And hey, they’re teens now, so they don’t need me every minute!) I walked the Canyon Road galleries in Sedona, having the best morning of my life, while my son took his dad to play nine holes against the most spectacular, surreal red-rock backdrop. It was his favorite day of the trip.
